Mommy Talk

Before I get to this week's question, I just wanted to give an update on Kayla. We did take her in yesterday as soon as the urgent care clinic opened. The verdict: More than likely strep. Poor kid. The doctor didn't want to put Kayla through the swab test; she didn't feel it was necessary. Based on her symptoms, how her throat looked ("her throat is nasty-red looking") and that her "breath smelled like strep" (I didn't realize strep had a distinctive smell) she was going to treat her for strep and prescribed an antibiotic. We headed to Walgreens to fill the prescription yesterday so hopefully she's on the way to feeling better!

She's been feeling miserable and I can't blame her. A few years ago I had strep and it was absolutely awful trying to swallow. She's hardly been eating or drinking anything since Thur and it's hard to watch her refuse whatever we offer. She was the same when she first woke up this morning. I could see it was hurting her to swallow and her mouth is so dry. About an hour or so after I gave her the Ibuprofen she actually asked me for eggs!

Me, "You want eggs?"
K, "Yeah"
M, "Are you actually going to eat them?"
K, "Noooo"
M, "Kayla do you want eggs?"
K, "Yeah"
M, "Will you eat them?"
K, "No."
M, "Do you want eggs for breakfast?"
K, "Yeah."
M, "ok then."

She did eat almost 2 scrambled eggs and asked for refills on her milk. I just hope she'll continue to drink throughout the day and eat something for lunch and dinner.


This is the last week of the Mommy Talk questions - I've enjoyed reflecting back on my pregnancy and early newborn days with Kayla!

Here is the last question, "Grandparents: what is their relationship with your child(ren) and how do they fit into your child's life?"

Unfortunately we don't live close enough to any sets of grandparents to see them on a regular basis and I wish we did so they would be able to see each other more often! As it is Kayla sees her grandparents maybe 2x a year. Despite the distance I do have to say that she is one very loved, and spoiled!, grandchild!

Mommy Talk

Today's Mommy Talk question:

Your biggest challenge of motherhood: how things were when baby was first born, how things changed as time went on and what type of challenges are you facing right now?

Besides the whole challenge of being a new mom and having a newborn in the house?! I had a couple challenges that stand out.

First, I think obviously, was dealing with Kayla's diagnosis. The harsh reality of not just leaving the hospital with your newborn and going merrily on your way; instead it was dealing with the reality that "oh my gosh my child has "something" we're going home from the hospital with a diagnosis."

Not only did I have to deal with how that felt for myself and worried about what that meant for our future, and her future, but also how to tell our family and friends and what would they think? Would they accept her? Support us?

About a week or so after Kayla was born I came across the Welcome to Holland poem/essay. I know most people either love it or hate it. For me I loved it. I didn't dissect it, I didn't read different meanings into it, I just read it for the simple statement it said to me.

By the time I finished reading it I was crying. What I took away from it was all summed up in the last sentence. Basically saying if you spend your life mourning you may never be free to enjoy the good and beautiful things.

That spoke to me. It made me realize that this diagnosis wasn't "all bad" - it was just something different, and different isn't bad. It was just something we were going to have to learn about and deal with. It made me start seeing my daughter as just that - my daughter - and not just her diagnosis.

The other challenge I dealt with was nursing and Kayla's weight gain - or lack thereof. I nursed her till she was a little over a year old, but I don't think in the beginning I ever felt comfortable, or competent enough. I just didn't know if she was actually nursing because of hunger, or because of comfort. I didn't know if she was really getting any nourishment - if I was producing milk. I pumped and would get a good amount doing that, but I didn't know if she was getting the same amount out. I had heard/read that babies with Down syndrome can have a hard time nursing because of low muscle tone, so I always worried about that - if she was getting enough, nursing long enough, if she was doing it right.

I just couldn't tell with Kayla. She didn't cry that often and she slept a lot. She hardly work up the first night we brought her home. At her 2 week check up she wasn't even back to her birth weight. Maj. S told me to wake her up every 3 hrs if she wasn't waking up on her own; I would do that, but as soon as she would start nursing she would fall asleep. I tried undressing her, rubbing a cool washcloth on her face - all to no avail. She would start nursing and fall back to sleep.

It was very frustrating...newborns are supposed to be hungry and eat every few hours around the clock, and she just didn't seem very interested.

The other problem was how to tell when she was done nursing. Everyone said "you'll just know" - she'll pull away or turn her head or whatever. Kayla rarely did this either. She would nurse until she fell asleep. So I tried putting her on a schedule - every 3 hrs and 15 min on each side. I don't know if that was the right thing to do or not, but I didn't know what else to do.

Maj S observed her nursing during one of her appointments and said everything seemed to be going fine, that Kayla seemed to be nursing correctly - had a good latch, was sucking and swallowing, but still I worried.

I worried because she was very slow to gain weight. We would go in for monthly weight checks and she was always so far down on the bottom of the chart.

I went in for her 5 month weight-check and the scale showed the exact same weight she was at her 4-month weight-check. I gasped and mentioned that to the tech. She weighed her again. Same weight. I think she saw the look of alarm on my face and the tears forming in my eyes because she went to get Maj S. I didn't have an appt - this was just a weight check, but Maj S took the time to come talk to me and calm my nerves. I felt horrible. I felt like an awful mom. How could my baby not gain one single ounce in a whole month? How was that even possible? What was I doing wrong?

Maj S reassured me that Kayla looked healthy and didn't appear like she needed hospitalization. She watched her in the car seat kicking her legs etc and asked me "is she always that active?" I said "yes" and she replied, "maybe she's burning off the calories faster than you can keep them in her!" She suggested to offer her an additional ounce or two of bre*st milk in a bottle after nursing to see if she was still hungry.

We tried that and sometimes she would take it, other times not. She was just bound to be a very small child! We didn't even turn around her car seat until she was almost 2 years old because that is when she finally reached 20 lbs. She's only 30 lbs now - 30! For a four-year old! So that was quite a challenge for me.

What I'm facing now? Kayla's still a very active child! She can't sit still; I think it's physically impossible for her to be still! Even sitting in a chair while eating her legs are constantly in motion. I seriously think she might have ADHD. She's just so easily distracted too.

What were some of your challenges?

Mommy Talk

Today's Mommy Talk question is a little weighty! Here is the question: How hard was it for you to lose your pregnancy weight and keep it off?

Losing the weight? Not too hard. Keeping it off? Ummm...well...

I didn't gain a lot of weight to begin with. I gained under 20 lbs and I don't know how that was possible because I seemed to eat all the time!

After Kayla was born most of that weight came off, since it was baby, fluid, placenta etc weight. The clothes I wore home were the same clothes I wore when I was 9 months pregnant. Let's just say they were a little too big...especially the shorts!


When I got home I felt like I was in that "in-between" stage again - a lot of the maternity clothes were too big, but my pre-pregnancy clothes were still too snug around the belly.

I did bre*stfeed Kayla and I heard that helps the weight come off. I think it was a whole combination of that, plus just the stress of having a newborn and being a first-time mom, which helped me lose weight rather quickly.

But then I had nothing to wear. I went to the store with my mom to find some shorts to get me through the rest of the summer. I remember almost having a meltdown right then and there! I remember holding up a couple pair of shorts and saying, "but I don't know if I should buy this size because I can wear it now, but what if I keep losing weight, then this size won't fit me anymore anyway and will be too big on me!" Oh those post-pregnancy hormones and exhaustion! It made shopping feel like a much bigger issue than it should be! Bless my mom, being so patient and understanding with me and just giving me a hug and a shoulder.

So...I did lose all that baby weight pretty fast and went back to my pre-pregnancy weight.

Then a little after a year Kayla stopped nursing and I didn't go back to work. I realized over the last couple of years that I snack a lot more throughout the day then I used to!

So those "last 10 lbs of baby weight" that you always hear everyone wants to lose? Well I ended up getting that last 10 lbs back AFTER Kayla was a couple years old LOL And why does it all have to go to the middle? Why can't it just spread the love and spread out amongst legs and arms too? :)

Speaking about losing weight and exercise ... I recently had the opportunity to participate in Suave Presents Blogger's Tips for Busy Moms.

From the website, A new report of 3,000 U.S. moms reveals that although most (76 percent) agree it's just as important for mothers to take care of themselves as their families, nearly eight in ten moms don't do enough. One of the biggest things falling by the wayside is her sense of feeling and looking beautiful. A whopping 84 percent admit they've let their appearance slide since becoming a mom and that taking care of their appearance has become more of a wish than a reality. So, can motherhood and womanhood co-exist? Suave wants to help moms put themselves back on the to-do list, so we asked some of our favorite mommy blogger friends to share their tips with you.

Check out the tips on beauty, exercise, hair care, childcare, relaxation and cooking.

Mommy Talk and a Vacation!

First things first - we're heading out bright and early Monday morning for our vacation. We're going to be gone about 3 weeks, yes, 3 weeks! Wow! I'll be able to post here and there as I'll have access to a computer, but I just won't have much time to comment on all your blogs while I'm gone! (although I will at least try to keep up with them in bloglines and make sure I don't miss out on anything LOL) Sorry I haven't been around commenting much this week either; this was a "MOPS" week for me, and being on Steering (I'm finance) it takes 2 days out of my week, Kayla's on summer break, and preparing for our vacation I just didn't get to comment like usual.

So on to this week's Mommy Talk question:

What was your favorite "could not do without" maternity items?

The first thing I thought of was my body pillow! That helped me sleep much more comfortably especially in the later months of my pregnancy; although Joe was glad when I finally put it up in the closet as I'm sure it felt like a 3rd person in the bed!

I also couldn't do without the "What to Expect When You're Expecting Pregnancy Organizer." I loved having everything in one place for me to record all those little things that I otherwise would probably have forgotten! I like to read back through it on what I was feeling on certain days, when I felt her move the first time, etc. Treasured memories now!

Mommy Talk

This week's question from Mommy Talk:

Baby Names on your list...What name did you chose, and why?

For as long as I can remember I have always liked the name Kayla. Ok I got it from that soap opera (Days of our Lives) and the character Kayla Brady (you'd be surprised how many hits I get from searches with any variation of Kayla Days hairstyle...guess she's still as popular now as she was 20 years ago!)

When we started going through the baby name book I immediately put Kayla down. It would be in the top and luckily Joe agreed he liked it too.

Here are some of the girl names we had: Lorelai (yes from another TV show - Gilmore Girls), Amber, Caitlyn/Caitlin, Leah, Renee/Renae, Ashley, Catherine, Serena

It was so hard finding boy names for our list though! Nothing I looked at just "felt" right - maybe it was because I didn't want to put a lot of thought into it since I wanted a girl!

We had 2 names, yep, just 2 names that eventually made it on the list. I liked Tyler and Joe liked Ethan. If Kayla had been a boy the name most likely would have been Ethan Tyler, because that had a better flow to it than Tyler Ethan. So there you go!

Mommy Talk

Today's Mommy Talk questions are:
Did you find out the sex? Why or why not? honest...did you have what you were hoping for? (if you want, you can include ultrasound photos)

Nope! We were in the minority when it came to not finding out whether we were having a boy or a girl. Not counting the u/s I had at 5 and 12 wks (where you couldn't find out the gender anyway) I had 4 u/s (3 of which were 3D/level II) and each time we made sure to tell the tech we did not want to know the sex so please don't tell us!

Let me tell you, this drove my mother-in-law crazy! (Sorry MIL, you know we love you though!) She hated not knowing because she wanted to start buying gender-specific items; but we wouldn't cave!

I will admit there was a very small part of me that was tempted to find out, but I had heard of too many stories where couples were told one thing based on the u/s and out came the opposite gender! I just didn't want to risk that; besides I wanted to be completely surprised during delivery.

Thank goodness Joe and I both agreed from the beginning not to find out. I'm really glad we didn't because I looked forward to the anticipation of finding out at the moment of birth whether we had a son or daughter. All that waiting to meet our little one was so worth it to hear Joe say, "we have a daughter!"

We both wanted a daughter too, so yes, we did get what we had hoped for! Actually we had started referring to "the baby" as "she" (even though we didn't find out) and I used to joke that if we had a son we were going to give him a complex by calling him "she" while he was in the womb!

Here are some u/s pictures. Even though we had the 3D shot I don't think they came out that great. They weren't clear like I've seen some others and I couldn't compare Kayla's picture to the u/s and say she looked just like that! Her face was always pushed up against my placenta and appeared squished.

I also have a little video clip from the u/s (4D) but for some reason it's just not loading correctly. If I can figure it out I'll post that later.

24 weeks and 5 days (the first 3 where all taken at the same visit)


You can just make out the nose and mouth


being a little shy and not wanting her picture taken (just like her mommy!)


35 weeks - she looks a little mad in this one!


When I was going through my files I found this picture and thought I would post this one too. Joe and I took an OB Orientation class on base. The guys got to wear a "sympathy belly"

Mommy Talk

Mommy Talk questions for May 7:

How much weight did you gain (w/picture if you are you brave enough!)
What did you like MOST about pregnancy?
What did you like the LEAST?

I gained about 18 pounds, which doesn't seem right because I ate all the time! Here are some pictures:

32 weeks


34 weeks


36 weeks - perfect picture of that linea nigra!


38 weeks and 4 days. Last picture before Kayla was born - 2 days later!


What I liked most about being pregnant - just being pregnant! I loved, loved, loved feeling the movement. I could just sit for hours with my hands on my belly feeling her move around. I was constantly in awe that there was this little tiny human being growing in there!

What I liked least - not a whole lot (as I mentioned previously I had a rather uneventful pregnancy!) I could do without those leg cramps though!

Mommy Talk

This week's topic over at Mommy Talk is to describe your pregnancy...cravings, sickness, etc.

I'm sorry to disappoint, but my pregnancy was pretty uneventful! It lacked most of the usual known symptoms! Soon after getting that positive pregnancy test I kept waiting for something to happen, to feel like I was pregnant, but for the most part nothing changed.

I had no cravings. Oh sure there were times when I might have said, "oh such-and-such sounds really good right now." But it wasn't a "I need it NOW" craving; there was nothing I had to have all throughout my pregnancy.

Most smells didn't bother me, I had no aversions to food, I didn't suddenly dislike something I've always liked nor like something I never liked before.

I didn't have swollen ankles.

I didn't have morning sickness. There were times I had a stronger gag reflex while brushing my teeth and once that made me throw up, but that was it.

I did have the usual ligament-stretching, achy-crampy tpye of feeling.

Ok I did have a few symptoms...

Hunger. I would bring a few snacks with me to work so I could have something between breakfast and lunch, and after lunch. I remember being so hungry, but watching the clock because I didn't want to eat my snack too early, because lunch wouldn't be for a few more hours. I would be so hungry in the later afternoon too...no matter how much I seemed to eat!

Later on in my pregnancy I would sometimes have the sciatic nerve problem while sleeping.

I wasn't able to roll over in bed so smoothly; it took some effort to get my belly over to the other side. I remember it feeling like a multiple-step process just to go from laying on my left side to my right side and vice versa.

Oh and the leg cramps! Yes those got me. It usually only happened at night and then while I was turning over and stretching. If I stretched my legs too much the cramp would seize my calf and make me sit straight up in bed as if someone lit a fire under me. I wanted to scream out in pain when that happened.

Kayla was born in the summer, but I don't remember feeling miserable in the heat, or at least no more miserable than I was before I was pregnant!

I pretty much loved every day of being pregnant!

On a separate note: Don't forget Amy's scavenger hunt starts tomorrow!