Planned or Surprised?

Over at http://alittlemommytalk.com this week's question is whether your child(ren) were planned or a surprise.

My answer is Kayla was a planned surprise! We had been trying for a baby for 13 months, so we were definitely planning on having one. It was a surprise when the pregnancy test finally showed up with the faintest of faint lines. So faint that I would squint to look at it and then convince myself it wasn't there. I finally showed Joe that evening and he swore he could see a light line right away.

Actually since I'm on this topic...I wasn't planning on announcing this to the "whole world" but yes we have been trying for another baby. We would love nothing more than to add to our family and give Kayla a sibling. Unfortunately we've been trying, yet again, for over a year. 15 months to be exact. I'm becoming very discouraged that it's taking so long again. I guess we should have started when Kayla was a year old. I didn't want to start that early, because I figured surely it wouldn't take us over a year again. If we think like that and we start when she's 1 then we would probably get pregnant on the first try and I wouldn't be ready for a second child yet! Yeah so I decided we could wait another year, and now another year has passed. I really had wanted Kayla to have a sibling only a couple years apart, not 5 or 6.

I just wish trying to conceive didn't have to be so frustrating at times. I think what makes it frustrating is "they" (medical community) make you wait a full year before you can even begin any testing to find out why. A full year is such a long time when you're trying to conceive. What if it was something simple as I have a blocked tube and it can be fixed, and could have been fixed months ago? But nooooo..you have to be trying for a year.

Then you have to get an appointment with your primary care manager, who puts in a referral. Except your referral is reviewed at the women's clinic and the dr there says she needs to see you first before sending you downtown (why didn't they send me there first instead of seeing my PCM?). Then you have to wait some more until you're at certain points of your cycle to have certain blood work, or testing done.

It's all a waiting game. Waiting for your cycle, waiting to ovulate, waiting those 2 weeks to see if this month, this month, could really be it, and then no. There goes another month. Waiting, waiting, waiting again.

Sorry, I didn't mean to get off on a tangent like this - as you can tell I'm just very frustrated.

So I decided to finally post about it because I need to ask for prayers. I believe in the power of prayer. So if you could spare a prayer for God to bless us with another baby, I would really appreciate it.