How Come Kayla...

A couple weeks ago I went on Kayla's school field trip to the zoo. I had another boy - O - to chaperon as well. It's always fun for me to see Kayla and her classmates interacting and how much they seem to like her and get along with her. But it also reminds me of the differences and even though they appear to accept Kayla, even at this age they do recognize differences.

Kayla, O, and I sat on the bus together and not longer after we left it was obvious O had some questions about Kayla.

First he asked, "how old is Kayla?" I told him he could ask Kayla. The same time Kayla was responding "I six" O was saying, "but I'm tired of her always telling me she's 6!" in this exasperated tone, like he thought she was lying to him all this time. It made me laugh.

I told him that's because she IS six. He seemed skeptical. The questions started.

How come she doesn't look like she's 6? How come she's so small? I'm taller than her. How come she can't do xyz. How come she still scribbles? How come she doesn't listen all the time? How come she talks like that?

He seemed most interested in the way she pronounces some words. He mimicked some of her speech patterns ... copying her after she said certain words (like "Kayla" still comes out 'Kay-ya'). He wasn't doing it in a bratty, or mean, way. He just seemed curious.

I did my best to just answer that everyone is different and not all the same height. Some people have trouble learning how to do things and Kayla is learning how to speak and write, but its harder for her so it takes a little longer for her to learn those things.

On the way home he was mimicking her speech again and then I brought up sign language and explained that Kayla also knows how to talk with her hands and she can use signs for words. I told Kayla to show him a few signs like 'please' and 'share.' I was going to show him some animal signs but he shook his head and said he didn't want to learn any signs. I explained to him that one day he might meet someone who can't hear and if he knew some signs he would be able to communicate with that person.

So I said "This is the sign for friend" and Kayla and I signed friend. He seemed really interested in that and sat up in his seat watching my fingers. He then concentrated on his own fingers doing the right movements for 'friend.' Then he turned in his seat so he was facing Kayla directly, put his hands out close to her face, signed 'friend' and gave her a hug. Yeah, my heart melted.

I know that Kayla's speech and language aren't like a typical six-year old. I know she has issues with pronunciation and doesn't use full sentences. She seems to use as few words as she can to get her point across. But I'm so used to the way she says her words that I know what she's saying and I sometimes forget that not everyone can understand her. Especially other kids. The field trip made that point obvious, and then a few days later it happened again.

We were at a local park and Kayla was on the tire swing when another girl joined her. Within a few minutes that girl started asking "How come she talks like that?" and I used the same answer that some kids have trouble learning how to say words, that some things are harder for her to do but she is trying her best. I then said "but she has a lot of words that she can say and you can understand."

So that turned in to a 'game' of sorts.
The girl said "Say car."
Kayla, "Car."
Girl, "Say hair."
Kayla, "Hair."
Girl, "Say sister."
Kayla, "Titer."
Me, "Kayla, ssssissster."
Kayla, "Sister."
Me, "See she can say a lot of words."
The girl continued with word after word and some phrases (I love you. I love my family.) Kayla smiled and giggled the whole time.

A short time later a boy joined them on the tire swing. As soon as he sat down Kayla said, "Say car."
Boy, "Car."
Other girl, "Say bouncing car."
Kayla, "Say bouncing car."
Boy, "Bouncing car."
Kayla, "Good job!" That's my girl!