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Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Politeness, Part Two

Awhile ago I did a post on Politeness and Kayla's good manners with the use of the words "please" and "thank you."

She also uses the word "sorry." A lot. Every day. She uses it no less than 10x a day, but probably much more than that. She uses it when she has nothing to be sorry about, and no need to apologize. I wonder if it is genetic because I apologize for things that aren't my fault, or that I have no control over. I know I use the word a lot.

As with anything you're teaching your child she first started using it with prompting from us, "Kayla say you're sorry" and she would sign it, which led to signing and saying it, and now just saying it. She's been saying it for several months now, sometimes in the right context, sometimes not so much.

I think she uses it sometimes as a way of saying "excuse me" - if she's trying to get through a group of people she squeezes her way through legs and furniture while saying "sorry!" She uses it when she's underfoot and in the way (for instance in the kitchen, which is already small enough with one person in there, if you turn around and bump into her).

She says sorry to inanimate objects, "sorry baby." Or the time we were in her room and she walked on her hat. "Ouch! (pause) sorry hat" - did I get a laugh out of hearing her say that!

Then there are the times she should use it when she doesn't. Kayla has a tendency to be all arms and legs and flings her limbs every which way, usually making contact with some part of your body, especially when she's trying to sit in your lap. It's not uncommon to get an arm, hand, elbow to the face, foot to the stomach, knee to the groin - you get the picture. We exclaim, "ow!" and she asks "okay?" instead of apologizing for knocking your teeth out. At least she shows concern and asks if we're ok though!

One day we were in her room and she inevitably got me somewhere with some part of her body. I said "ouch" and she asked if I was ok. I said "no, that hurt." Then I tried, "when mommy says ouch tell mommy you're sorry."

It wasn't but a few seconds later when she stubbed her own toe (or something) on the glider and said, "ouch!" followed by "sorry mommy!" I had tears rolling down my face because I had just finished telling her to say "sorry mommy" when I said ouch so I guess she figured she should say it when she said ouch too. For weeks after that I would hear "ouch! sorry mommy" anytime she would say ouch. I would hear it when I wasn't even in the room with her. She's been better about not saying "sorry mommy" all the time, but as I said, she still says sorry. A lot.

I had the video camera on a couple of months ago and you can hear her saying "sorry mommy" when I intentionally said "ouch" just to see if she would say it.

She's such a character!


amy flege said...

that is so cute and what a littl smarty pants!!! :)

Mike said...

I, too, want my children to be polite. I have to be careful with what I wish for.

One time, while inside the bookstore, I quietly asked my 3-year old to return the books that his little brother scattered around the children’s section.

My 3-year old smiled, stood at attention, saluted and—loud enough so the whole city could hear—said, “Sir, yes, sir!”

Everyone gave me the look. I try to give them the look that explains that my 3-year old is only playfully pretending to be a soldier.

My 1-year old joined in. He pointed at me and said, “Oh-oh.”


Kentucky Gal said...

I think it's always best to be polite than rude...she is such a little sweetheart!!

Amy said...

Kayla, you are such a cutie and you make me smile alot! Michelle that is just too precious. Thanks for sharing your life with us! Kayla really is a bright spot during the day when it gets so hectic.

Jessica said...

Oh Kayla! You make my day!

Linda said...

She is a character - but a very sweet, little character. We tend to misuse sorry around here too. I think we use it in place of "I didn't hear you". I guess it's better than "Huh?"
All of those cute little things she says and does are making such wonderful memories. These days will go by much too quickly. It seems I just turned around and they were grown. I miss those little voices.

Sara said...

oh my gosh, how cute! And she is a smart one!!!

Anonymous said...

oh michelle... Kayla just keeps you on your TOES!! and when you least expect it, she makes you Laugh!!! what a wonderful day that is, when you can laugh and smile :)
Loved the video and enjoyed reading "polite" part II, :) love Mom

Nisa said...

Iloved this post. I was laughing so hard while reading it that my mom heard me from downstairs. What a cutie Kayla is! I loved the part in the video, just after she says "8!" where it sounds like she sighs a long sigh. She's so sweet.
love you.

Tracey said...

Man, that's a stitch!! And way to go on the numbers and letters! I am so amazed at all that she knows. HOW do you get her to sit still? My 4 year old still doesn't want to learn his letters and numbers (though, I think he knows more than he lets on) and I can't corral him long enough to have "learning time."

LeslieAnn said...

Oh, she's such a sweetheart! And smart! Jack has always said, "Thank you" but we're having trouble with him saying, "Sorry" and "Please." I need to show him this video!


Pamela said...

Michelle, she just keeps getting cuter and cuter! If truth be told, I have caught myself apologizing to inanimate objects too. I hope no one ever catches me doing this in public. I immediately catch myself and chalk it up to, at least my heart is in the right place! lol :)

Nisa said...

P.S. I was getting the kids ready for school this morning and I told Nate: Auntie Meesh has a new video of Kayla up... And he was so excited: put it on, put it on... SO, he watch with headphones on, laughing quietly and then he noticed the picture of Kayla off to the side with the toy he gave her and he pointed to it and smiled. Kayla and Nate just made my day. love you!

ChupieandJ'smama said...

Such a sweety! My older son was the same way and sometimes still is. He was with his dad the other night when DAD got a speeding ticket and when they got home he said "Sorry Dad" because he thought he was talking too much in the back seat and Dad was paying attention to him and not the speed limit and that is why he got the speeding ticket. We had to explain to him that it wasn't his fault, just Dad's fault for being too careless and not paying attention (in Dad's defense it was right where it went from 45 mph to 35 mph).

PEA said...

What a little character she is! lol I always love seeing videos of her:-) She'll eventually learn how to say sorry when it's the right time to say it...like any child with a new word, they tend to use it a lot for any occasion at the beginning. What a joy she is in your life:-) xox

LauraJ said...

hee hee :D not only do we get to see her being silly, ouch! sorry mommy. We also get to see her little crook of the arm trick. Lol. she's just so sweet!!

chelle said...

Always adore your videos! It is inspires me to take more, now to follow through!!!

We try to teach manners too! So when Becca says "Excuse Me" she adds "Excuse Me People" even after a burp!

Momo said...

According to the fact that beggars can't be choosers...kids must not be rude!

Beck said...

She should move to Canada - we have the reputation (somewhat undeserved, a lot of the time) of being very apologetic. I catch myself apologizing to furniture I've bumped into!

Julie Julie Bo Boolie said...

Oh I just wanna squeeze-hug her to bits! She's so sweet! Chloe always says "Sorry Sarah" no matter who she's apologizing to LOL

Aren't they funny?

Air Force Family said...

Kayla is too cute! I enjoyed the video of her.
Michelle, I'm the same as you. I apologize for everything whether I have control over it or not. My Steve finds it very frustrating that I apologize for everything. lol

Sandra said...

She's too funny Michelle. My 3 year old always says sorry for everything too, and when I reprimand him for something or say "you understand?", his reply is always "I undetand". LOL

It cracks me up!!!

Anonymous said...

I just love the videos of Kayla! Her little voice just sounds so cute!! I think that is so adorable how she said sorry to her hat!! that is just too cute!I don't blame you for crying after you told her to say sorry mommy and she said it! I would of too. She is truly a sweetie!
Tiffany enjoys watching ther videos of Kayla. she thinks she is so cute!

jotcr2 said...

That is precious.