The Parent's Guide to Down Syndrome (Review and Giveaway)

Disclaimer: I received a free PDF copy of the book in exchange for my honest review.

If you have received a prenatal Down syndrome diagnosis, or are a new parent to a baby with Down syndrome, there is a just-released book written just for you. (The book is also worthwhile for any parent of a child with Down syndrome to peruse as it contains information through the adult years.)

The Parent's Guide to Down Syndrome: Advice, Information, Inspiration, and Support for Raising Your Child from Diagnosis Through Adulthood is co-authored by Jen Jacob (author, co-founder and VP of Down Syndrome Diagnosis Network) and Mardra Sikora (author, speaker, motivator, and advocate).

This comprehensive, up-to-date, organized and easy-to-read guide is full of information, resources (including links to all websites), and support. It is easy to navigate the different stages you, and your child with Down syndrome, will find yourselves. The book is short (under 300 pages) so it is easily 'digestible' while still providing a lot of valuable information.

- Part One covers "The Basics" of what Down syndrome is, receiving a prenatal diagnosis, and receiving a postnatal diagnosis at birth

- Part Two covers "The Journey" with chapters focused on newborn, baby/toddler years, primary/middle school, teenage years, and adult years

- Part Three lets parents know "You Are Not Alone" and covers support and research and a world-wide network connecting families who have a loved one with Down syndrome

Throughout the book there are plenty of quotes and stories and experiences from numerous parents on this journey, but more importantly there are the voices of those who have Down syndrome giving their perspective on their lives and advice to parents.

Mardra put together some great information on the making of this book and things to keep in mind, such as this: "we worked hard to educate the publishers about people first language and its importance – there are a few missteps within the pages. These editors worked hard to quickly tackle a subject new to them while helping us get a lotof information shared in short order. The effort resulted in overall helpful materials for parents (and others) with a few slipups that I ask be forgiven, like any other proofreading error, and will be adjusted on future print editions, and hopefully sooner on Kindle formats."

You can also find more information on this book at this link.

I've been on my own parenting journey for 12 years now so a lot of the information/resources etc aren't new to me (which is fine as it's most beneficial for new parents), but I would have appreciated having this book after Kayla was born. While the information that comes with a diagnosis can be, and is, overwhelming, this book makes it easy to skim through and pick out what is relevant to what you need at that time of your life.

And our journey isn't over, by far. We will be entering the teen years and that, of course, will quickly be followed by the adult years. I enjoyed reading those chapters as they give me a glimpse into what to expect with my own child.

Don't just take my word for the great resource that is this book; you can read what other bloggers are saying about the book, too.

For the giveaway. There is a Grand Prize giveaway, and then there is a single book giveaway (this one is just from my blog.)

To enter to win the book from my blog just leave a comment (making sure I can reach you) saying what your current go-to resource is for Down syndrome (if you have one). I will pick a winner via random.org in a week.

To enter the Grand Prize which includes the book (of course), other book resources, a totebag, stickers, and a free registration for this year's 321eConference (all valued at over $200) just enter the simple and quick Rafflecopter:

a Rafflecopter giveaway

You can get connected with the Parent's Guide to Down Syndrome Facebook page as well!

   

D is for Down Syndrome Information

I didn't know Kayla would be born with Down syndrome, I knew it was a possibility because of the triple screen I had, but I didn't confirm it with an amnio.

I never did receive much info about Down syndrome from the OBs office, or from the hospital where Kayla was born. The only information I was ever given was from Kayla's assigned pediatric provider from the military clinic. She tried her best with providing us info but all we took home was some medical info printed off the internet.

This was only twelve years ago.

For parents with a newborn with Down syndrome - whether diagnosed prenatally or at birth - there are a few places where you can get support, information, resources, and up-to-date accurate information about Down syndrome.

Down Syndrome Pregnancy is a program administered by the National Center for Prenatal and Postnatal Resources at the University of Kentucky's Human Development Institute. They produce Brighter Tomorrows - an online resource for new and expectant parents, and the Lettercase booklet Understanding A Down Syndrome Diagnosis.

The Down Syndrome Diagnosis Network provides education, support, and connection with other parents who have been there; who have received a Down syndrome diagnosis.

If you have received a new diagnosis of Down syndrome hopefully you'll find the support, education, information, and network from these links to help navigate what this diagnosis means.

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Delivering a Down Syndrome Diagnosis

We had 3 different dealings with the medical community regarding Kayla's diagnosis of Down syndrome.

The first one was with the results of my AFP prenatal screening test. Since this was a screening test  my doctor wasn't delivering a confirmed diagnosis, but rather should have been letting me know what my chances were for having a baby with Down syndrome. The doctor that called me with the results was one from the OB practice that I didn't care much for as I felt pressured by him to have the AFP in the first place. He told me that my results were 'positive' and I should schedule an appointment with the high-risk OB for a level II ultrasound ASAP. He made it sound urgent that I have this u/s done with no time to waist. I remember asking him if there were any kind of numbers from the test - I don't know what I was looking for, but something concrete. He told me no, just that it was positive. He was very brusque and hurried. He was incorrect in telling me the test was positive (yes, Kayla does have Ds, but again, this was a screening test - not a diagnostic test). He was also incorrect in telling me there were no numbers. I found out at my next appointment that week with a different OB in that practice (not the high-risk OB) that the screening test showed I had a 1 in 88 chance of having a baby with Ds.

After Kayla was born I looked at her face and immediately recognized the characteristic shape of her eyes and knew in my heart that she had Down syndrome. I asked the midwife who looked her over briefly but was noncommittal with an answer.

It wasn't until Kayla was taken out of the delivery room for the newborn examination and then a doctor later returned to talk to us about his observation of several characteristics that indicated Down syndrome. This was not a doctor we had ever seen before, he wasn't the doctor from the base who would become her pediatrician. Overall I don't remember him having any bad bedside manner with delivering the news. He indicated they would have to do a blood test to check her karyotype  in order to confirm the diagnosis. I don't remember a lot of what he said as I think I was in a fog, but I don't remember it being negative in nature. I felt like he was trying to be upbeat and positive.

The third interaction was with who would become Kayla's pediatrician from the base clinic. We hadn't yet met her, but she was the one who called us with the results of the karyotype. She asked us if we wanted to make an appointment to get the results or get them over the phone. I knew if she was asking if we wanted to make an appointment that meant she had Ds - she wouldn't ask if we wanted an appointment just to say she didn't have Ds. Joe was the one on the phone so I told him to tell her to tell us over the phone; I didn't want to wait for an appointment. When Joe said, "She does" it was obvious what that meant. Again, she wasn't negative with her delivery and when she saw us for Kayla's 2 week well-child visit she was very nice and kind, concerned and caring. She had some info printed off for us about Down syndrome, made sure we were aware of registering her in the military's Exceptional Family Member Program, and giving us the information for the local Early Intervention Center.

Thankfully we didn't have the horror story of diagnosis delivery that other people have received. Unfortunately medical personnel are still delivering the diagnosis in a not-so-caring way.

There are resources for the medical community to use in order to be more effective and neutral when giving a parent this diagnosis - whether pre- or postnatally.

The Lettercase booklet Understanding a Down Syndrome Diagnosis is known as the 'gold standard' for providing this information. It's the only resource that has been reviewed by representatives of national medical and Down syndrome organizations. It provides balanced and up-to-date information.

Down Syndrome Pregnancy's booklet Diagnosis to Delivery: A Pregnant Mother's Guide To Down Syndrome is a wonderful resource for woman who have just received the diagnosis prenatally and are deciding what to do with the information, and for women who have decided to continue the pregnancy.

The Down Syndrome Diagnosis Network provides resources and education and allows parents to give feedback to the medical providers on the quality of their prenatal or birth conversation diagnosis.

Mark Leach of Down Syndrome Prenatal Testing wrote a great article about delivering the Down syndrome diagnosis and the importance of medical providers delivering accurate, up-to-date, unbiased information.

Lastly, many medical professionals fail to mention that adoption is a real and viable option for couples who may decide they don't want to parent their child with Down syndrome. They are only presented with two options, continue the pregnancy and raise your baby - or terminate the pregnancy. Adoption is a third option and needs to be included when delivering this diagnosis. The National Down Syndrome Adoption Network can assist families who wish to pursue this option. Their mission is to ensure "every child born with Down syndrome has the opportunity to grow up in a loving family."

It is 2014, there shouldn't be any reason for a parent to have a negative diagnosis deliver story.

 

Babies - More or Less

I've been thinking about babies lately. And whether I want any more; although Joe and I are 99.99% sure we're done with two. It's just so hard to make that decision a final one though, isn't it?

There are a few bloggers I follow, and a couple ladies in the Moms Club, who are expecting. When I went to the Mom's Banquet and saw the moms with their cute pregnant bellies it made me ... wistful I guess.

Wistful because I loved being pregnant. Despite the usual aches and pains (and it was really bad with Lucas) I had pretty uneventful and easy pregnancies. No morning sickness. No weird cravings, no cravings at all actually. No swelling. I enjoyed being pregnant and feeling that new life growing inside of me. It's hard to think of that not happening again, of not experiencing that again.

But to be honest, last year was tough. Post-partum depression, endless crying (Lucas and me!), sleepless nights, exhaustion, constant nursing, Joe' deployment looming down on us...it all took it's toll on me and I was not a very happy person to be around.

Last year was probably the most challenging year of the 8 years we've been married. I was stressed, had no energy for anything, felt like running away, no patience, little things set me off - and Joe took the brunt of that. Because who else was I going to take it out on? Definitely not the kids, but the one person who would take it and still love me anyway. (Sorry honey!)

As much as I enjoyed being pregnant, I just don't think I can go through that again - the newborn/infant stage. I know my limits, my personality, and what I can handle. I'm already an (admittedly) inpatient person and having two kids, one with special needs even, hasn't given me more patience (I wish I was one of those parents who say "having a child with special needs has taught me to be more patient" cause I sure missed the lesson on that one!). I stress too easily, I'm not calm and laid-back and I don't think I would be a very good parent to 3 kids.

I really admire the moms I see who have more, or are having more, than 2 children. I wish I could do it, I wish I had it in me, but I just don't think I do...and that makes me a little sad...and a little wistful.

Because we do make some darn cute kids!

Not Yet...But Soon...

very soon...I think.

I'm pretty sure we'll be heading to the hospital tonight or tomorrow. At least that's the way it feels right now.

On top of that though, I've got whatever cold thing is "going around." Stuffy/congestion, head hurts, coughing, sneezing etc. This has been going on for a few days now, but this morning, felt like I couldn't function much at all. Thank goodness Joe was around and only had to go in to work for a couple hours.

Would appreciate any prayers for a smooth and easy delivery as I feel it's going to happen this weekend...thanks!

Now back to vegging out on the couch...

I Just Realized...

that I should probably post something so people don't think I'm in the hospital having a baby! Nope! Not yet anyway. Joe will update when that happens!

I did have an appointment on Mon (what is up with these long wait times lately? This time was another hour! Is it this long at other OB offices?!) and really not much to report. He said I was "50-60% effaced" this time. So not much progress!

I have to admit, when I found out 2 wks ago that I was 50% effaced, even though I knew it didn't really mean anything, I know you can stay like that for weeks, I still thought I was going to have this baby soon! I told Joe on Sun morning that I really didn't think I was going to make it to 38 wks, but here we are and now I find myself getting anxious. Every morning I find myself wondering if today is THE day! So I still have 2 wks, I'm not thinking about the 2 wks on the other side of the due date; I really don't want to go late.

Not much else has been happening around here; except a couple blogger awards I need to acknowledge!

Kristiem gave me the Thank you so much! This award was started here.

I'd like to pass it on to some bloggers who live in other countries:
Shelley
Karen
Me
Leanne
Christina

Karen gave me this one: I don't consider myself a "cool" mom by any stretch of the imagination, but thank you for you thinking so! :) I'm passing this one on to:
Chelle
Sandra
Melissa
Beck
Corey

Choosing a Name

I think apart from the actual labor and delivery the choosing of a name for your child has to be one of the hardest things! Unless you're lucky and you've known for years what you would name your kids and you happen to marry a guy who agrees with you...then end of discussion!

It's not that Joe and I even have disagreements about names, for the most part we agree on a lot of the same names. That might be the problem though. We agree on too many names and are now trying to narrow that down. We've narrowed it down to a few, but we just can't say for sure what name will be "the one" we stick with. I know some people wait to see their baby and then they just know what his/her name should be, but I don't know if that will happen for us; we just need to decide!

We do have a few names left over from our list when we were expecting Kayla - like Leah - but I think that sounds too much like Kayla so that's off the list.

Then there is the meaning of a name...how much weight do you put into what a name means when deciding on a name? What if you really like the name, but don't like the meaning? Do you still go with the name, because really, how often do we even use or talk about the meaning behind the name? We have a name we both like, but it means "elf ruler" and ummm...that put a kink into for me! Elf ruler? Really? Do I want my potential daughter to look up her name and see it means that? LOL

After you sort through names you need to see if it sounds right and flows ok with the last name, make sure the initials don't spell out anything, does the name "go" with the other family members' names, etc. So much to think about!

A few people have asked if we have names picked out (and we sure didn't make it easier on ourselves by not finding out the gender!) so here is what is currently on the top of our lists:

Girl:
Ashley Lauryn or Lauryn Ashley
Aubrey Lynn
Jessica Lynn

Boy:
Nathan Tyler or Nathan Lucas
Lucas Tyler or Lucas Michael
Liam Scott or Liam Michael

I think we even have a few more combinations, but I need to find my slip of paper!

Oh decisions, decisions!

Just another reason I'm not ready for this baby to arrive!

Girl or Boy?

I used to always want one of each, but now? I'm not so sure! I started out wanting a boy this time, but there is a part of me that would like another daughter. I think it would be nice for Kayla to have a sister.

Besides, there are all the baby girl clothes I've saved! Kayla received so many clothes, and she was always small for her age, slow to grow, so by the time she could wear something it was out of season. A lot of her clothes she didn't get to wear that much, so it would be nice to have another girl and be able to use those clothes again instead of having to go buy a boy's wardrobe!

And then there is this: I find myself thinking, "...but I don't know what to do with a boy!" I know that sounds ridiculous, believe me, I do! I've heard other moms say that before and I used to think it sounded silly. You don't do anything different just because they are the opposite gender - you just do the same thing! Except now I'm in those shoes and I feel like I understand what is meant by that statement. We've had a girl in the house for the last 4.5 years; it'll seem weird to have a boy!

Which probably means we're having a boy! LOL

I do know that no matter if we have a son or daughter they will fit right in to our family dynamics, things will all come together, and we'll be in love with this next child just as much as our first.

So I thought it would be fun to have a little poll up to see what you guys out there think we are having. There is a little poll on the top right sidebar, just vote for which gender (and it's anonymous).

I think it's one of those "old wives tales" but if there is any truth to it and you want to know what this baby's heartbeat has been to help you make your choice I'll tell you...it's mostly been in the 140s. Last week was 152, but for the most part it seemed to hold steady at 140s (although that could be just guesstimates from the midwives and doctors as they didn't actually count it each time). And for the record? Kayla's heartbeat was about 140s/150s throughout too.

Denial

I think I've been in denial that we're going to have a baby in the house sometime in the next few weeks! I don't know how that can be when I'm getting kicked and pushed in the ribs, can't sleep, hard to roll over, hard to bend over and tie my shoes, my sides and back hurt...etc...it's obvious there is a baby coming! LOL

I guess at first Feb seemed so far away and now it has crept up on me and I'm not ready.

I am ready to meet our new baby and have my body back to myself! But I'm not completely ready for doing this all over again!

As we were going to bed the other night I told Joe I'm just not ready for there to be a newborn in our room again! I like my peace and quite, even if I have trouble sleeping through the night. I'm not ready to have to wake up every few hours for those diaper changes and nursing sessions. I just want to enjoy this last little bit of time before our family becomes a family of 4.

Last weekend I started to feel different feelings and sensations, different pressure and pinches. So when I had my OB appt on Mon I asked the midwife to check and see if anything was going on. I didn't really expect her to say anything other than, "nope, nothing is happening!" So I was a little shocked when she did in fact say "your cervix is thin and you're 50% effaced." I did a quick intake of breath..."I am?!" Now I know that women can stay 50% effaced for weeks and nothing happens, so I didn't go home thinking "ok any day now!" but it really made me realize how close we are getting to bringing this baby home...and how little preparation we've done!

We really needed to clean out/organize/purge our outside storage closet and shed; but a lot of that I just couldn't do without Joe's help. Yesterday he tackled the storage closet and I helped when I got home from MOPS. We were able to find the bins with all of Kayla's old clothes (I saved just about everything!) I retrieved the 2 that had the newborn and mostly 0-3 clothes and brought them inside. Now I need to go through and pull out the gender-neutral ones, and maybe one girl and one boy (yes I do have a few boy-specific clothes from when Kayla was born) outfit for coming home from the hospital. Then I've got to wash everything.

Today Joe was able to clean out the shed and we were able to find the infant car seat, bassinet, swing (which we had to throw away because mice got to it), baby bath, bouncer ... thank goodness everything else was in good shape - just needs a good washing. See I really did save most everything of Kayla's! I didn't think it would be almost 5 yrs before we had another though :) (Mom you would be shocked to see what these look like now - there is room to move around!)

So we're making progress; I still need to start packing a hospital bag though. We have a list of names we're working with...still need to make a decision on which name we're going to use.

I guess the countdown has started; I just hope this baby gives us a couple more weeks at least!

I Am (and contest winners)

I saw this at Jennifer's blog, who got it from Jodi, and wanted to try my hand at writing an "I Am" poem.

I AM (title)
I am pregnant
I wonder if we're having another daughter, or a son this time
I hear the fast whoosh whoosh of the heartbeat at every appointment
I see my belly moving and it brings a smile to my face
I want my husband here to feel the baby's movements

I am a military wife
I pretend it's not that hard to have him deployed, but at times it is
I feel the empty space in the bed next to me
I touch his face in my dreams
I worry what civilian life will be like when he retires
I sadden at the thought that he, and thousands of others, won't be home for Christmas

I am a mother of a daughter who has Down syndrome
I understand society doesn't always accept people like my daughter
I dream that one day they can look past the extra chromosome and see her for herself
I try to raise awareness
I say she deserves the same chance and opportunity as your child
I hope she will be strong and persevere against any prejudice she encounters
I am in awe of all she has accomplished already

~~~~~~~
The winners from the photo book contest, picked using Random.org are #s
10 - Leslie
28 - Julie
8 - Dori

Congrats and I'll get the kits out to you as soon as I can!

A Face Only a Parent Could Love

Yep I had another u/s today - it will be my last one unless I get one of the non-medical ones you have to pay for (which I'm considering just for one more peek at this little one growing inside of me!)

This baby sure wouldn't cooperate for a 3-d image; the face has to be in a certain position for the tech to get a really good, clear image and s/he didn't want to move (although kicking wasn't a problem!) Plus s/he kept putting their hands up in front of the face which didn't help either!

I'm only measuring 2 days ahead (well the baby is anyway), so everything looks good. Also found out s/he weighs 2.6 lbs.

This baby sure doesn't look like they are going to have a little button nose like Kayla! I think that must be Joe's nose! :)

Come Meet Our Son...

...or daughter! LOL Yeah I know that was a tricky title!! :)

NO! We are NOT finding out the gender; although a small part of me does want to just know, I remember how exciting it was to find out at the moment of Kayla's birth and want to do that again.

I mentioned I had an u/s appt last Thur. I'm finally getting a chance to post a few pictures. She gave me a few more pictures, but they are standard 2-d profile, here is an arm, 2 feet etc.

The baby is measuring 5 days ahead, hope s/he doesn't get too big! Kayla was 6 lbs 13 oz and I don't want a baby much bigger than she was! :)

S/he was lying face down in a vertical position with the butt just under my belly button. Little stinker wouldn't cooperate and move the head much to get a good face shot though! Baby is about 7 inches long and I think she said 10 oz (but don't quite remember).

Here is the little foot the tech said was about 1 inch. One little inch! It's amazing I can feel all this movement every day!


Being shy and hiding...and looks so skeletal still at this stage! The tech said those great 3-d pics you see in magazines usually happen around 30 wks when there is some fat on the bones :)


The best she could get of the face


The perinatologist will see me one more time, as she said for a "growth check." I'm not sure why if baby has been growing well so far and everything looks fine, but I'm not going to argue with another chance to get a peek! Maybe baby will cooperate next time and smile for the camera! :)

A Little More Real

Today I finally had my first OB appt. I've been waiting for this day as it just makes it feel more "real" you know? And I managed to get myself an ultrasound! Baby measured right on target (I'm 9 weeks and 3 days) and although you really can't make out much now, here's our little one! And there is only ONE! :)



The head is on the right (as you're looking at the picture) - the little bump in the middle is an arm (I believe it is anyway, the tech didn't really say anything about what was what) and to the left of the picture you can make out a "z" - that is the leg/foot. Heartbeat was strong at 176.

And this little 9 week old was a jumping bean! I didn't really think there was much movement at 9 wks, but oh my goodness! The whole body - all 1 inch (about that anyway) of baby appeared to be "jumping." We even saw the faintest little arm reach up and move back and forth - it was amazing!

The rest of the appointment was pretty uneventful - come back in 4 wks and have a nice day!

For those who have asked, I'm still feeling great! Just tired, and always hungry. I feel like I eat every hour, and when that hour rolls around it feels like I haven't eaten in days! Still no morning sickness (knock on wood!) - again I didn't have any with Kayla either, guess I'm just lucky like that!

Oh, when the nurse was checking me in w/weight, BP, temp and all that stuff she mentioned how they usually give out the diaper bags at the first appt, but they, um, didn't have any right now. What?! How does an OBs office run out of the diaper bags? Don't they know I was looking forward to my free "gift" of a diaper bag filled with goodies? I'll just have to remind them at my next appt that I didn't get my diaper bag!

For the Rest of the Story...

or ... In Which I Drove Myself Crazy ... so I made the big announcement and then provided a few details, but here is the story behind when I finally decided to test.

A little history here first: When we started trying with Kayla I read the book
Taking Charge of Your Fertility and I realized there was so much I just didn't know! After reading that book I vowed to never be a chronic pregnancy test-taker! I would just chart and temp and be able to know what was going on with my cycle by that. And it worked. I could tell exactly what was happening because my temps were doing what they were "supposed" to be doing. About mid-cycle, after ovulation, my temps would increase and stay that way for about 2 weeks. Then they would start to drop as I was coming to the end of that cycle. According to the book if your temp stays high for 18 days past ovulation then you are pregnant; so I thought - wow no need to waste money on tests - I'll just watch my temp!

Ok so I had been temping and charting again. In May after my cycle started I was supposed to call the hospital and make an appointment for a hysterosalpingogram . I called and she said it has to be 10 days after the start of my cycle. That would have put the appt on Wed, May 30...umm...we were leaving for our road trip on Mon, May 28th. I was both frustrated and relieved. Relieved because I had been dreading having this procedure done and glad I could have one more month to "try again", but frustrated because we would have to wait yet another month to find out if anything was going on.

So we left for our road trip and I figured I wasn't going to bother taking my thermometer with me; I wasn't going to try and chart and temp while we were on the road. But this doesn't mean that I wasn't paying attention! I still knew exactly where I was in my cycle, what cycle day it was, and around when I should be ovulating. I don't ovulate one the same day every cycle either. Sometimes it's day 12, sometimes 14, sometimes 17 etc.

So anyway, I never knew exactly when I ovulated and I had no idea what my temps were. I knew Friday, Jun 15, was cycle day 27 and that I was probably going to start a new cycle that weekend. Sure enough, that evening before bed I noticed some spotting. That had been happening for a couple days before I actually started my cycle, so this was like clockwork, I knew what was coming. With a heavy heart I went to bed and told Joe this month was out.

Then Saturday there was no more spotting; I kept expecting it and nothing. I wondered if I should get hopeful. I briefly thought about going to buy a test and taking it the next day - Father's Day. Oh what a wonderful surprise that would be for not only Joe, for his parents since that's where we were. But I talked myself out of it. I know how I am, if it was negative I would have been so depressed and I didn't want that. Not only that, how would I have managed to buy one without anyone else knowing about it? So then not only would I have been depressed - the other 3 adults in the household would have been disappointed and I didn't want that!

Besides, Sat was only day 28 and I've had cycles as long as 32 days. I wasn't technically late. I had no reason to really suspect that I might even possibly be pregnant. I just had that bit of spotting Fri night. I scrutinized my past charts (I used an online charting website) and found a cycle where I spotted and then had nothing for several days, and then finally started. Ah ha! There was my proof that this spotting meant nothing because it had happened before!

So Sunday and I'm still waiting and nothing. I'm starting to get a teeny, tiny, bit hopeful. But it's still only day 29, not really late. And since I don't know when I actually ovulated I don't know how many days past ovulation I was. Now I was seriously regretting NOT having my thermometer with me! If I just knew how many days my temp was high I might have had reason to hope!

Monday morning we left for home. I still haven't mentioned anything to Joe about my cycle never starting. I don't like to get my own hopes high much less anyone else's. So I alternated the whole time about being hopeful and being practical.

When we got home I wanted to test so bad just so I would know. But I again talked myself out of it. Have you ever had a conversation with yourself inside your head? This is what I sounded like, "No just wait until morning. Everything says it's better/more accurate to test first thing in the mornings. Oh but I just want to know! It's day 30 now! But it's still not really late. Besides, if I just wait until Tues morning I can finally take my temp, then I'll know. If it's higher than usual on day 31 I'll have a reason to test. If it's lower than I'll know this month is out." That's the conversation I had with myself the rest of the afternoon!

Then I just could not sleep Mon night! I was so anxious to find out what my temp was! I was awake at midnight and thought about temping then, but nooooo....you can't temp at midnight -that's not after a night's sleep and it's not the usual time you temp! I was awake at 3 and tempted to temp again....nooooo....you'll wake Joe up and he'll wonder why you're temping at 3! Just wait a few more hours!

Kayla woke up around 6 and when Joe got up to go get her I took my temp. This was usual for me to take it around that time. I'm sure when Joe came back in the room he just wanted to shake his head seeing I was already back to my routine of temping! When the thermometer beeped I held my breath as I looked at the read-out. 98.9. I remember my breath catching in my throat. That is much higher than it should have been for the end of my cycle. It usually would be below 98.4.

Kayla fell back to sleep in our bed and Joe got up. I'm getting really excited and hopeful this time. Kayla woke back up around 7 and went to join Joe in the living room. Now I feel like I can't get out of bed...I'm too scared to test and find out it's negative. Finally I couldn't take it any longer.

I mentioned before when I tested with Kayla it took 4 home pregnancy tests and 2 blood tests before I could get a positive confirmation; I was afraid something like that would happen again.

So I tested and stared at the test strip. Almost immediately 2 lines showed up. I couldn't believe it. I was stunned, in disbelief. I didn't think it would show up that quickly.

I started crying and thanking God for answering my prayers. Then I pulled myself together and started thinking how I was going to surprise Joe.

I had a Father's Day gift for him at home (I didn't bring it with us on the trip). It was a gift certificate to a bike store in town. So I stuck the test strip in the envelope with the certificate.

I went out to the kitchen where Joe was making breakfast and said, "so do you want your Father's Day gift now or later?" Of course I was hoping he would say now and not make me wait! I was also trying to keep a calm, straight face, and not let on how excited I was.

Thank goodness he said, "I guess now is fine." He opened it, saw his certificate, said thanks. I said "there is something else in there." He finally saw that little strip. He looked at it, looked at me, looked at it and I think he was speechless.

I finally threw my arms around him and said "yes we're pregnant! We're pregnant!" and he said, "I thought your cycle was starting!" I said, "so did I! I really did!" and then I had to explain to him the whole saga of what I had been going through the last few days!

On Thur I went to the clinic and thankfully was able to get a blood test (they say they want you to be 2 wks late before they'll give you a blood test! Two weeks! Can you imagine having to wait 2 wks after taking a home pregnancy test?!) I had my blood drawn at 2:30. At 4:00 the phone rang and the nurse told me it was positive.

We bought a packet of white t-shirts for Kayla and some iron-on transfer sheets. I created the "Big Sister To Be" on the computer, printed it off and Joe ironed it on the shirt. Then I took "hundreds" of pictures of her trying to get her standing or sitting still so you could actually read the shirt. Once I got a shot that was "good enough" I printed off the picture. I then mailed that picture to all the grandparents and that is how they found out.

As for Kayla...well we told her I had a baby in my belly. The first time she looked at us like we must be crazy. She said in this really serious voice, "ooooooh ok" like she was humouring us. But I would tell her that every day. Now when I ask her "where is mommy's baby?" she lifts up my shirt, points to my belly button (while saying "right there") then gives it a kiss, then gives me a hug. She started that on her own (kissing my belly button). I don't think she quite understands yet, but it's sweet that she kisses my belly now!

And that, is the rest of the story!

FAQ

First of all, thank you all so much for the congratulations and well wishes! We had been trying for almost a year and a half, so needless to say we are so very excited to be expecting our 2nd child!

I know I didn't include those all important details that everyone wants to know when you find out someone is pregnant! So here are some answers! I have a separate post on when I finally tested, how I told Joe, and the grandparents, and Kayla's, reaction!

1. I'll be 7 weeks on Sunday.

2. I'm due on Feb 24th.

3. I found out on Tuesday, June 19th. That was the morning after we returned home from our
vacation/road trip. Which, yes, means that it did indeed happen while we were gone!

4. That was also 2 days after Father's Day - belated gift for Joe! Why didn't I test on Father's Day? Believe me I was tempted, but you'll find out why I didn't in the above-mentioned, soon- to-be post.

5. If I can help it we won't be finding out the sex. We didn't with Kayla and I liked it that way. Although the farther I get in this pregnancy I might not be able to stand the suspense any longer and will just need to know. Maybe. Hopefully not though. I liked finding out at birth that we had a daughter and am looking forward to that experience again.

6. I really don't have a preference to whether we have a boy or girl. Sure having a boy would be nice to have one of each, but I would be just as happy with another girl (besides the fact that I have most all of Kayla's old clothes and would love to have a girl to wear them again!)

7. I've been feeling great! Ok I've been really tired and hungry. It seems I'm always complaining to Joe how hungry I am - just can't seem to curb the hunger pains!

8. So far no morning sickness (please knock on wood now that I've put this down in writing for all to see!) But I didn't experience any with Kayla either, so hopefully I'll be just as lucky the 2nd time around too.

9. My first doctor appt isn't until July 25th. It seems so far away, but I'll only be 9 weeks then.

10. Joe is deploying in a couple of months. He's not going to Iraq, but he is going somewhere "over there." He's only supposed to be gone for 4 months; so he should be back about a month before the baby is due.

I think that just about covers it for now!

Mommy Talk

Mommy Talk questions for May 7:

How much weight did you gain (w/picture if you are you brave enough!)
What did you like MOST about pregnancy?
What did you like the LEAST?

I gained about 18 pounds, which doesn't seem right because I ate all the time! Here are some pictures:

32 weeks


34 weeks


36 weeks - perfect picture of that linea nigra!


38 weeks and 4 days. Last picture before Kayla was born - 2 days later!


What I liked most about being pregnant - just being pregnant! I loved, loved, loved feeling the movement. I could just sit for hours with my hands on my belly feeling her move around. I was constantly in awe that there was this little tiny human being growing in there!

What I liked least - not a whole lot (as I mentioned previously I had a rather uneventful pregnancy!) I could do without those leg cramps though!